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Some bored person on the web created a Zoosk profile for Superman. In the Story section, the comic book superhero explains, “Long story but let’s just say you better be ready for a love affair that’s out of this world.” Under movies, Superman writes, “Action. His perfect match has alliteration in her name, and his ideal date is anything not involving Kryptonite.

The Huffington Post dubbed Taylor, “a veritable Ok Cupid God” due to his array of zany photos, including one of him sitting lakeside with red writing saying “YOU” and pointing at the empty chair beside him.

This gem of a dating profile, highlighted by Cosmopolitan, has one of the most laugh-out-loud About sections ever. I hope this 24-year-old single has boys lining down the block for her.

You’d think everyone on Ok Cupid is there because they want to meet people. Some users just want to be left alone while they wait for an imaginary perfect match to fall in their inboxes.

These side-splitting online profiles can be witty, crazy, or just plain stupid, but at least they’re memorable. A lot of guys paint a picture of their ideal date — dinner, movie, makeout session, etc.

But one 22-year-old single took this trope to ridiculous and glorious levels on his dating profile.

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